Dick had an inkling she was giving him the eye. He wasn’t sure if it was the stink eye or the come hither eye. He couldn’t tell, because he had his back to her. Oh, he knew she was there. He could feel her glare.

Melanie kept staring. She too had an inkling. It was that he would turn around soon. They always do. She always gets her supper.

When Dick did turn around, Melanie didn’t break. She just kept staring.

“Do I know you?” asked Dick.

“I don’t know,” said Melanie. “What’s your name?”


“Well, now that’s appropriate.”

“How so?”

“You look like a Dick.”

“That’s not very nice.”

“Oh, it isn’t?” inquired Melanie. “That’s too bad.”

“Wow,” said Dick. “You’re playful.”

“It’s my way.”

“You’re also very beautiful.”

“That too is my way.”

“I like your way.”

“Most men do. The question is, ‘what are you going to do about it?'”

“Take you home?”

“Is that a question?”

“It’s a proposition, I guess.”

“With a question mark.”

“Okay, fine. You got me. I’m a little intimated.”

“Of what?”

“You,” said Dick.

“Ah, the truth. Now we’re getting somewhere. What about me intimidates you?”

“Your oozing with sexuality.”

“Isn’t that a good thing?”


“What about now?”

“Right now it’s a very good thing.”

Melanie smiled. Dick smiled back.

“Can I buy you a drink?” asked Dick.

“I thought you were going to take me home.”

“Oh, yeah. I mean, yeah, we can do that.”

“What about the drink?”

“I mean… we can skip it if you want…”

“You don’t sound convinced.”

Dick’s mind was getting scrambled with visions of various forms of undress for Melanie. He froze. Melanie moved in for the kill. She put her hand on Dick’s thigh.

“Relax Dick. Go with the flow.”

Dick stared at Melanie, his breathing was getting heavier. Melanie moved her hand up Dick’s thigh.

“Now tell me, what does Dick want to do?”

“Dick wants to take Melanie home. Definitely. Definitely.”

Dick suddenly found himself doing an impression of Dustin Hoffman in “Rain Man.” Melanie laughed, breaking the tension slightly.

“Tell Dick to meet me outside in five,” said Melanie.

Dick shook his head, yes. Beams of sweat were beginning to form around his eyebrows.

“Oh, and Dick?”


Melanie leaned in closer.

“I’m going to do very bad things to you,” she whispered in his ear.

As Melanie sauntered towards the exit door, Dick turned to the bartender.

“Check please!”

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